Transforming Death in Our Experience
During this time of awakening, it’s important for us to reconsider our feelings about “death.” So often – almost daily – I see pleas on Facebook, in email, etc. asking for everyone to pray for and/or send healing energy to someone so they will get better from _____. That (of course) IS perfect and (yes, REALLY) very helpful… however, I also see the same pleas for those who are on their last legs of a terminal illness that they have accepted as part of their path (typically things like “please pray for _____ to get better…”)
OF COURSE, EVERYTHING is curable… we can release EVERYTHING; a GREAT example of this is Anita Moorjani’s story, Dying to Be Me, where, at the verge of death via stage 4B cancer, with her organs literally shutting down while she was in a coma, she “stepped out,” remembered all of this, and instantly released/healed the causes of the cancer… and subsequently woke up completely cancer-free.
HOWEVER… during this time, many are choosing their “door” to transition out of the body as part of their journey.
Often, I’ve seen someone hang around long after they might have had otherwise had their family/friends not continually made them feel as if they had to stay longer. This happens a lot with immediate family… and this causes the one at the doorway to hesitate because they feel like they’re letting their family down, that their family won’t be able to go on without them, that they have to “be strong” and “take one for the team,” etc. The person’s ego gives them the motivation to stay because it validates their worthiness when others tell them as much… even if they are in considerable physical pain and limitation still in the body.
Yes, it’s ok to grieve/mourn, it’s ok to be sad… and it’s also ok – and important to all involved – to let them go.
The biggest resistance we have about death has only to do our own fears and beliefs about it – that we will be “separated” from our loved ones, that we/they will be judged and punished somehow, etc. As I understand it, it’s simply a time for transformation and transition, from the part of our consciousness that’s within the 3D physical to be released from it… like throwing out an old pair of jeans that don’t serve the person anymore. If they’re done with the lessons they aspired to learn in this lifetime, then it’s time for them to go (funny, my hubby and I had this conversation with my daughters one night at the dinner table… my oldest, who’s 17 – and quite the worrier – said, “Well, you talk a lot about how when someone’s done with their lessons in this life, that’s when it will be time for them to go… so, that really means that some freak accident can just happen because it’s “that time”… no matter where the person is…” We assented as that being our understanding; she thought about it and said, “So, it’s really useless to WORRY about it, because when it’s time, it’s time…” Yep, pretty much so… )
When we start living from the perception/remembrance that we are all One, that this is all illusion anyway, that our loved ones are NEVER actually apart from us – whether they’re in the flesh or not – and the only judgment we receive is that which we hold on ourselves, and that death is simply a transition that is actually an accomplishment in itself… then it becomes far easier to accept and honor this as part of everyone’s individual journey.
In the first decade of 2000, I had an 8-year period where 9+ people in my family and friends passed away… so I’ve definitely experienced that kind of loss first hand! In multiple instances, it was saddening to see the pain, suffering, limitations, and internal battles that were going on in their physical body… of COURSE that was no way I wanted to see someone I loved! So… I verbally told those who were “holding on” in such a way that I loved them, that of course they were loved, and standing in that love, I told them it was OK for them to go, if they so chose (and I encouraged other family members to do the same)…and it was amazing how quickly and easily they passed on afterward (with a “follow-up visit” from them each time, after things had settled LOL… for THEM to express their love and gratitude for the support).
I know that it’s often challenging for the ego to let go – there’s always “an excuse” with which to persuade someone to stay – but when we believe and remember that everyone’s journey is their own, that and we simply honor them for their choices with unconditional love, regardless of the outcome… that really helps to shift the experience for the person and for all involved, from one of conflict and resistance to that of support and love to aid in their transition, if that’s what they choose to do. And, acceptance on all parties involved allows the end of their time here in that body, for this life, to be more enjoyable, graceful, and easy.